A society that normalizes bullying is no society at all. But here we are, in the grand age of progress, where we’ve apparently decided that bullying suddenly isn’t that big of a problem—it’s just an edgy personality trait for future leaders of our nations. It’s as if we took all those anti-bullying campaigns from the early 2000s and collectively decided to toss them into the same memory hole where we keep the Blockbuster membership cards and AOL dial-up tones. Who needs moral decency when you can trend on Twitter as you tell someone their entire existence is a waste of oxygen?
Despite our tireless efforts to “stamp out” bullying, it seems to have taken on new, creative forms—like a persistent black mold. Schools, workplaces, politics—you name it—bullying has found a way to embed itself into the fabric of our daily lives like a smug stain we refuse to acknowledge.Yet, we continue to pat ourselves on the back for making “progress” that’s entirely superficial. Sure, we’ve got rainbow flags and corporate wellness programs, but heaven forbid we truly address the root cause of half our societal ills. No, let’s just sweep it under the rug with the rest of our inconvenient truths.
In reality, bullying has evolved. As we’re churning out bad sequels to movies and series nobody asked for, it’s come back bigger, meaner, and more passive-aggressive than ever. Now, in our so-called civilized society, we either look the other way or—better yet—find a way to profit from it. After all, if we didn’t enjoy a good public dragging, why would reality TV exist?
So, how is it we’re now staring down the barrel of a society that actively rewards the very behaviors it claims to condemn? Well, the real question to ask is: “Are we ready to admit that bullying isn’t just a schoolyard problem but a cultural one we’ve meticulously nurtured into a full-blown societal epidemic?” Yes, it is.
The Absurdity of Normalizing Bullying
If there’s one thing society excels at, it’s taking something awful and making it fashionable.Somehow, someway, bullying has become the social glue holding together the fragile ego of our collective consciousness. Gone are the days when bullying was confined to wedgies and lunch money shakedowns; now it’s an art form that’s taught in business schools.We’ve got workplace bullying, cyberbullying, political bullying—you name it—bad behavior has become ubiquitous, influential, and wildly profitable.
Just watch a few moments of your average reality TV show, or even most primetime television, and you’ll see bullying packaged as “drama.”You know, these things many of us binge-watch while clutching our overpriced oat milk lattes, pretending we’re better than the people on screen as they rip each other to shreds for our entertainment! Well, we may call it “entertainment,” but truthfully, it’s just bullying with a laugh track or some other justification for the sake of the plot. Honestly, watching it unfold, you must wonder if we’ve collectively confused cruelty with charisma. Somewhere along the line, being a decent human became as quaint as rotary phones and mixtapes.
Of course, we’ve somehow managed to also inject bullying into our politics, which is basically the Hunger Games now, but with fewer weapons and more Twitter tantrums.We call politicians bullying each other on the debate stage nothing more than “robust discourse” and slap it on the news for a prime-time slot. The only thing missing is a reality show spin-off where presidential hopefuls battle it out in a dunk tank. Actually, I probably shouldn’t say that, because I don’t want to give them any ideas!
But the real absurdity lies in the fact that while we’re busy glorifying aggressive behavior in every corner of society, we’re simultaneously running anti-bullying campaigns like we haven’t completely missed the point.The irony of such ridiculous misdirection is so thick you could slice it with a rusty butter knife. On one hand, we tell kids to be kind, stand up for others, and build inclusive communities; but on the other, we send them out into a world where the highest forms of success are seemingly achieved through ruthless, cutthroat behavior. No mixed messages there—nothing to see, folks. Move along.
So, what happens when we call out this contradiction? Cue the eye rolls, the dismissive shrugs, and the collective sigh of “Oh, that’s just how the world works.” Well, if “how the world works” involves normalizing the torment of others for personal gain, then maybe the world isn’t working all that well after all.
The Roots of Bullying
The roots of bullying run far deeper than your average schoolyard sociopath swiping someone’s lunch. We like to think we’ve progressed as a species, but if you look at the history of humanity, we’ve essentially perfected the art of bullying and branded it as power dynamics, control, and societal hierarchy.Take any empire, any major corporation, or heck, maybe even your local HOA, and you’ll find the same thing: people shoving others down the social ladder to make themselves feel taller. We’ve just gotten more sophisticated about it; basically, we throw a suit and tie on it and call it “leadership.”
Exacerbating the situation is social media, the digital coliseum of our time, which has become a breeding ground for cyberbullying. Apparently, it’s not enough to live in a world where you’re judged by your clothes, your job, or the car you drive. Now, we’ve added a virtual scoreboard where strangers can bully you over your opinion on pineapple pizza. It’s like someone saw ancient gladiator games and thought, “How can we make this more personal and devastating without actual physical contact?” Thanks, Twitter.
If you think this is all a modern problem, let’s rewind a bit. Bullying, in one form or another, has always been part of human society. The Romans were the quintessential master bullies. They didn’t just conquer you—they made you regret being conquered. Medieval knights wore shiny armor, but we must not forget how much of their lives were spent shaking down peasants. So, if you thought we were ever “better” than this, I hate to break it to you—we weren’t. We’ve just swapped swords for keyboards.
Philosophically, bullying plays right into some of our society’s favorite historical ideas. For example, Nietzsche would’ve had a field day with this; his whole concept of master-slave morality essentially gave bullying a fancy philosophical justification, after all. The powerful feel entitled to dominate, and the weak are expected to quietly endure, maybe even learn something from the experience. I’m sure you’ll find that concept heartwarming next time your boss passive-aggressively suggests you “step up your game.”
But it doesn’t stop with philosophy; no, let’s get scientific. Ever heard of evolutionary psychology? Turns out, bullying is deeply rooted in our primal urge to survive and establish dominance. Just like wolves in a pack or chimpanzees in a troop, humans have a habit of bullying to secure their place in the social pecking order. So, if that’s the case, you’re not being bullied at work because someone’s a jerk—it’s just biology! Thanks, Social Darwinism. Too bad Darwin never mentioned how to evolve past this nonsense.
Even the infamous bystander effect has gotten in on the action. Have you ever noticed how, in those viral videos of public shaming or online harassment, there are always plenty of spectators but very few people stepping in to help?This lovely little psychological quirk ensures that when we see bullying, we just assume someone else will do something about it. Of course, it just becomes a chicken game in which no one will. Welcome to the mob mentality, where no one’s guilty because everyone’s guilty.
There’s also plenty of other ways bullying intersects with the other “isms” we’ve managed to cultivate—racism, sexism, classism, et cetera.These social hierarchies love to piggyback on bullying because, well, why settle for one form of oppression when you can have a smorgasbord of them? Whether it’s kids being mocked for their race, women being bullied into silence in male-dominated workplaces, or economic bullying that keeps the poor in their place—there’s plenty of bullying woven into the very fabric of societal injustice. This is not something to celebrate.
The Societal Ills Linked to Normalized Bullying
It’s time to face the inconvenient fact that bullying isn’t just an unfortunate byproduct of human interaction; it’s the gift that keeps on giving, like a rash that won’t go away no matter how much cream you slather on it.The more we normalize bullying, the more it seeps into every corner of our lives, leaving behind a trail of societal wreckage that’s about as subtle as a wrecking ball smashing through your living room.
Let’s start with the obvious one, which is schools. They’re the breeding grounds for future therapists’ clients and denizens of addiction rehab centers. Bullying in schools is the gateway drug to a lifetime of trust issues, self-esteem problems, and—if we’re lucky—a lineup of inspirational TED talks about overcoming adversity.We keep wondering why mental health issues are skyrocketing among young people. Well, maybe we should take a moment to consider that getting metaphorically (or literally) shoved into a locker every day might not be the best developmental experience. Just saying.
Then there’s the workplace, where bullying dons its professional mask and gets a cubicle. It’s not bullying anymore, though—now it’s called “management.” We’ve turned toxic office culture into a badge of honor, where the ability to belittle someone with a smile is a prized skill. Oh, while we’re at it, let’s throw in some “constructive feedback” that sounds an awful lot like a personal attack, followed by a mandatory team-building exercise in which everyone pretends they don’t want to strangle each other. Productivity skyrockets—at least until the lawsuits start rolling in along with middle management’s heads.
Of course, workplace bullying has its own ripple effects. Toxic environments don’t just kill innovation—they take it out back, stomp on it, and leave it for dead. But don’t worry, the employees who survive will be fine.Sure, they’ll be emotionally scarred, but at least they’ll know how to navigate power dynamics and backstabbing, which is clearly the skill set we should all aspire to in the modern world. Forget creativity or collaboration—just sharpen your knives and get ready for your next performance review.
Finally, let’s talk about the hot button topic of political bullying. It’s like we all woke up one day and decided the best way to govern society was through Twitter insults and passive-aggressive speeches. If you’re not bullying someone on the political stage, are you even running for office? Political discourse has become an absolute farce, where grown adults resort to name-calling that would make a high schooler—no, grammar schooler—cringe. It’s no wonder public trust in politicians is circling the drain. Seriously, who wants to trust someone whose primary skill seems to be “sick burns” and thinly veiled threats?
Now, here’s where it gets tragic: this culture of bullying feeds into some of society’s deepest problems. Take the whole “cancel culture” fiasco as a prime example. What started as a movement to hold people accountable for their actions has, predictably, turned into a public blood sport. It’s not about justice anymore; it’s about who can get the most likes by tearing someone down in the most creative way possible. It’s social justice, rebranded as a gladiator match—minus the armor and swords, of course.
The worst part is that bullying doesn’t stop with words. It’s intrinsically linked to larger societal issues we mentioned earlier like racism, sexism, and classism. These forms of bullying are systemic. Racist microaggressions, sexist remarks, and economic bullying are all part of the same disgusting cocktail that keeps marginalized people down and maintains the status quo. We’ve somehow found ways to institutionalize bullying, wrapping it up in bureaucracy and red tape so tightly that half the time, people don’t even realize they’re being stomped into a bloody pulp!
As things are going, it seems the cycle never ends. Victims of bullying often become bullies themselves. After all, what better way to deal with your trauma than to pass it on to the next poor sap? It’s the circle of life—except instead of majestic lions, we’ve got emotionally damaged adults lashing out at each other like feral cats. The result is a society where cruelty is rewarded, empathy is dismissed as weakness, and the next generation gets to inherit a world even more toxic than the one we’re currently screwing up. But, hey, at least we’ve got memes to help us laugh about it, right?
Layers of Understanding: A Multidimensional Perspective of Bullying
Now that we’ve established that bullying is practically woven into the DNA of our society, let’s peel back the layers of this mess. Much like an onion, the more you peel it, the more likely you are to cry.
First, let’s look at the cultural layer.Bullying has become so mainstream that it’s practically a genre of entertainment. We can’t flip through channels without landing on some reality show where contestants belittle each other for a cash prize or social media validation. It’s like we’ve turned basic human decency into an obstacle course—one that’s way less fun than it looks.
Apparently, the more ruthless you are, the higher the ratings. This is what we’ve come to know as capitalism, profits at any cost. Even our so-called “heroes” in pop culture are often glorified bullies.Look closely at half the superhero movies these days: oh sure, they’re saving the world, but not without some witty one-liner that’s basically just a verbal wedgie for the bad guy. Still, we cheer for it because, hey, we’ve been trained to find humiliation entertaining. Why do you think they call television, and now streaming services, programming?
Moving on to the psychological layer, we dive headfirst into the normalization of another major societal problem: self-esteem issues. Bullying, in all its forms, leaves scars that are more than skin deep; it infiltrates your brain and rewires it to second-guess every decision you make for the rest of your life. How can you establish a sense of self-worth when you’ve spent most of your formative years dodging insults like Neo in The Matrix?
Bullies aren’t just tormentors; they’re unlicensed life coaches from hell, shaping your worldview into a nightmarish carnival funhouse where every mirror distorts your sense of self until you’ve become a caricature of insecurity. For some, that insecurity turns into the very thing they despised; hey, if you can’t beat them, join them, right?
So, now that we’ve reached the philosophical layer, we get to ponder one of life’s big questions: What does it say about human beings as a species that we allow, encourage, and sometimes even reward bullying? Well, it doesn’t say anything good. We’ve collectively decided that it’s acceptable to step on others to climb the social ladder, while at the same time, we have the audacity to pretend we’re all about kindness and empathy.
It’s a neat little trick—saying one thing while doing the exact opposite. This is the same philosophy that gave us things like “trickle-down economics” and “friendly fire.” We slap a nice label on a terrible idea and hope no one notices the hypocrisy. It’s societal gaslighting at its finest.
We’ve convinced ourselves that bullying is just a natural part of life—a Darwinian byproduct of survival of the fittest. Except, instead of actual fitness, it’s more like survival of the loudest, snarkiest, and most passive-aggressive. We rationalize it as necessary for “toughening people up,” because apparently, empathy is only for the weak and vulnerable. God forbid we create a society where kindness is seen as a strength. I mean what are we, a bunch of Care Bears?
So, when bullying gets normalized, we start believing that there’s no alternative. It’s like living in a house with a constantly dripping faucet—you get so used to the noise that you stop hearing it, even though it’s slowly driving you insane. We don’t even question the fact that bullying is a problem anymore because it’s just “how things are.”It’s apathy at its finest, where we’ve collectively shrugged our shoulders and decided that cruelty is just part of the human condition.
So, after peeling back all these layers, we find a society built on bullying, held together by fear, insecurity, and the occasional reality TV show. Unless we start questioning the foundation, we’re just going to keep slapping Band-Aids on the gaping wound and wondering why it’s not healing.
Actionable Advice: Breaking the Cycle of Bullying
Now, we’ve waded through the muck of how society treats bullying like it’s just a quirky personality trait. But honestly, sitting around pointing fingers and cracking jokes isn’t going to fix the problem. So, let’s pivot to something more constructive. Believe it or not, there are ways to break this cycle, although I’ll admit, they require a bit more effort than a viral hashtag campaign.
First, on an individual level, we need to start by holding up a metaphorical mirror—and not the Instagram filter kind that makes you look like a doe-eyed angel. This mirror is for self-awareness. We must recognize when we’re the ones participating in, or quietly supporting, bullying behavior. Obviously, nobody likes to admit they’re part of the problem.It’s much easier to pretend we’re all saints who’ve never made a snarky comment at someone’s expense or participated in a group chat that got a little too “roasty.”But, acknowledging your own complicity is the first step toward, you know, doing something about it.
Next, we need to level up on empathy training. I’m not talking about that half-hearted “be kind” poster taped to your office breakroom wall. I mean actual empathy, the kind where you stop treating other people like NPC’s in your personal video game. Engaging in empathy doesn’t require a PhD in psychology, just a little effort in seeing things from someone else’s perspective. When in doubt, ask yourself: “Would I want to be on the receiving end of this?” If the answer is no, congrats; you’ve just figured out how not to be a jerk for the day. Keep that streak going.
Also, when you see someone being bullied—whether it’s the classic schoolyard variety or the more sophisticated corporate bullying we now call “performance reviews”—stop being a bystander and say something.Bystanders are the unsung heroes in the battle against bullying, but too often, they just kind of stand there, probably waiting for someone else to handle it. But guess what? You need to be that someone else.
Standing up for others doesn’t have to be dramatic, either. You don’t need to swoop in with a cape and deliver a monologue about justice. Sometimes, it’s as simple as letting the person being bullied know they’re not alone or calling out the bad behavior in a calm but firm way. Think of it as a public service announcement, but with less fanfare and more immediate impact.
Now, let’s look at the institutional level, where the real fun begins. It’s time to drag these half-hearted anti-bullying programs into the 21st century and give them some teeth. Most of these programs are like putting a Band-Aid on a bullet wound—they might look good, but they don’t do anything productive. We need to stop focusing on the symptoms of bullying (like the “bully-free zone” signs that no one takes seriously) and start addressing the cultural rot that’s causing it in the first place.
We need institutions—schools, workplaces, and governments—need to actually hold people accountable. A slap on the wrist isn’t going to cut it. We need real consequences, the kind that make people think twice before they hit “send” on that passive-aggressive email or start spreading rumors in the breakroom.
Let’s also not forget the media’s role in all this. We can’t claim to care about bullying while also supporting TV shows and social media platforms that thrive on public humiliation and mean-spirited competition. It’s time to demand better. Maybe if we stop rewarding toxic behavior with prime-time slots and viral shares, we might encourage a bit more decency in our day-to-day lives. Radical, I know.
Finally, we absolutely must stop pretending that cruelty is strength! We’ve developed this bizarre notion that being tough means being ruthless. We romanticize the idea of the “hard-nosed” leader, the boss who “doesn’t take any crap,” or the politician who “tells it like it is”—but nine times out of ten, these are just bullies with great PR.Let’s start valuing kindness, empathy, and collaboration. Strength isn’t about tearing people down; it’s about lifting them up.
So, breaking the cycle of bullying isn’t impossible, but it does require us to care. We must care about others, care about our words, and care about the world we’re helping to create by our actions—and, even more often, inactions. It turns out that the only way to truly destroy bullying is to be relentlessly kind. How’s that for an ironic twist?
Closing Thoughts
So, here we are, standing in the wreckage of a society that’s built bullying into its foundation like some kind of tragic design flaw that no one wants to admit is there. Sure, we’ve got plenty of anti-bullying campaigns and hashtags in service, but these are like slapping duct tape on a sinking ship. We’ve spent so much time convincing ourselves that bullying is just an unfortunate side effect of being human that we’ve forgotten to ask whether it’s something we want to tolerate in the first place. We shouldn’t.
But the real tragedy here is that we’ve normalized cruelty to the point where it feels as inevitable as taxes and bad Wi-Fi connections. Truthfully, a society that thrives on bullying is a society in decline—one that mistakes pettiness for power and cruelty for charisma. Sure, we could keep ignoring it, brushing it off with “that’s just how the world works,” but at what cost? How long can we keep pretending that the damage caused by bullying isn’t bleeding into every aspect of our lives, eroding trust, empathy, and basic human decency?
Now, dismantling a society propped up by bullying isn’t going to happen overnight, or with a catchy slogan on a T-shirt. It’s going to take actual effort—something we’re famously allergic to when it comes to addressing deeply rooted problems. But imagine, for a moment, if we did. Let’s imagine a world where success wasn’t measured by how many people you step on to get to the top, where empathy wasn’t seen as a liability, and where kindness wasn’t reserved for Instagram captions.
Hey, if that’s too much to hope for, we can at least start by calling out the hypocrisy of all this and refuse to play along. It’s past due time we stopped glorifying the bullies, stopped giving them reality shows, and stopped letting them run for public office. Just maybe, we could even start valuing decency over dominance.
Ultimately, if we really want to rid the world of bullying, we need to do more than just talk about it. To dismantle a society built on bullying, we must first dismantle the structures of power that thrive on division, dominance, and silence. We must choose to not allow society to be overrun with social stigmas around substance abuse, anxiety, and depression, all directly resulting from unmitigated bullying.
As a society, we need to stop pretending that bullying is anything other than the toxic sludge that it is. If that sounds like a lot of work, well, it is. But considering that the alternative is letting the bullies keep winning, it’s well worth the effort. After all, if we don’t, we might as well just start handing out “Most Likely to Be a Boss Bully” awards at graduation and call it a day.
Who knows, maybe one day we’ll look back at this era of normalized bullying and think, “Wow, remember when we thought being awful was cool?” Hopefully, by then, we’ll have evolved past it—or at least invented better memes to shame those that still think it’s cool.
~ Amelia Desertsong
Photo by Lisa Fotios: https://www.pexels.com/photo/white-printer-paper-with-be-kind-text-on-plants-3972441/
