There’s truckloads of advice out there on how to be the best version of yourself. We’re constantly bombarded with “life hacks” and “success habits” as if we’re all malfunctioning robots just one app away from a factory reset. But, most of this advice is about as useful as an ejector seat on a helicopter.
I’ve waded through more self-help sludge than I care to admit. Most of it is nonsense. Sure, I’ve dabbled in the occasional “hack,” which I’ve subsequently butchered beyond recognition. Then, there are hacks that look more like Frankenstein’s monster than anything even remotely resembling efficiency. What most people seem to call minimalism these days is less about Zen simplicity and more about a borderline pathological obsession. The common theme with much of today’s “self-help” is urging you to cut out anything that might make life fun or, God forbid, spontaneous.
So, naturally, there’s the crippling frustration of constantly feeling like I’m “doing it wrong.” Every time life throws a wrench into my meticulously oiled gears, I can practically hear the self-help gurus cackling in the background. They’re wagging their fingers and muttering, “Told you so.”
Yet, after years of trying to follow every shiny new trend like a cat chasing rolling balls of yarn, I finally had a revelation. You ready for it? Just do you. Groundbreaking, right? It’s so original you might as well slap it on a motivational poster.
Sarcasm aside, it’s the truth. After years of trying to mold myself into some Pinterest-perfect version of a human, I realized that the only way to figure out who you are is to just stop trying so damn hard.
For me, I find my center in writing. It’s my own personal therapy. Indeed, it’s much cheaper than a shrink and lacks the awkward silences. Sure, I still get sucked into the occasional self-improvement scheme. But at the end of the day, I’ve resigned myself to taking the advice of Three Doors Down, “just let me be myself, so I can shine with my own light.”
So, I’m sharing what works for me, because it may work for you, too. Perhaps, it won’t. Maybe you’ll realize that the real secret to life is just figuring out your own way to muddle through it. I’m not here to tell you that you’re doing it wrong. After all, I’ve been doing everything “wrong” for years. So far, the world hasn’t ended, and I’m still breathing, for what it’s worth.
We’re all just stumbling around trying to make sense of this mess. We break down, we screw up, we get back up, and we try again. It’s absolutely imperfect, but that’s what makes humans so interesting. So, take the advice that works for you, chuck the rest, and just do you. Meanwhile, I’ll do me. With any luck, we’ll all turn out OK.
~ Amelia Desertsong
