There are many sleepless nights I find myself pondering things. So many possibilities run through my mind. Many seem impossible.
Late at night seems the best time to let the mind wander. It’s the time for dreams, right? But, even when lying down trying to rest, nothing goes according to plan.
Many nights aren’t what I would consider moments of inspiration. More often they’re moments of indecision. My imagination tends to go off on a random streak.
I get on a train of thought that becomes a wreck. Then, I have to pick up the pieces. Maybe it’s just from being tired, but my mind starts doing wacky things sometimes.
As I’m often so fond of saying, things are often not as random as they first appear. Even when my thoughts get derailed, there’s always a reason as to why. But, I may not be able to rationally explain why at the time.
Sometimes, I never figure out what I was thinking. That may be for the best!
Writing Doesn’t Always Go According to Plan
When I’m writing, it’s often that nothing goes according to plan. In life, you just have to accept that even the best-laid plans may not work out. Sometimes, they do. But, that’s the exception, not the rule.
When I set out to write a thing, I can’t tell you how.much of the time a topic I start with gets turned around. It will sometimes lead into something I never would have thought of before. Often, I’ll work it out. But, there are so many unfinished drafts on the verge of seeing digital oblivion because I don’t know what to do with them.
Writing is, by its very nature, a creative activity. It’s important to be creative in any way that you can in life. Try to always build on something. But, rarely do creative acts ever go according to plan, though. You have to accept that.
Life is just that way, too. In fact, the very reason that life rarely goes according to plan is that there are so many effects which will have causes you can’t imagine. We live in a highly complex and mysterious universe, and we have to learn to live with that.
I don’t fully understand my influences behind certain compulsions I’ll get. Especially when it comes to writing, I just get a need to express certain thoughts or ideas. The human mind constantly works on so many different levels. But, it’s definitely not as random as it first seems.
It seems I have a certain sort of fascination with understanding why I find myself needing to write about certain things. Sometimes I hate my brain for following certain patterns. It’s frustrating when my thoughts get seriously disorganized. I find myself staring at the screen and can’t compose anything. But the reason often turns out to be I need to be doing something else . I just often have a hard time figuring out what that is.
Rarely Does Anything Go According to Plan, Really…
I’ve come to accept that my writing will rarely go according to plan. I just let the writing come when it does. It’s convenient if it’s something that will pay well or something I’m passionate enough about that I don’t care if I’m ever compensated for it. I realize that I need a balance of both, with the more mundane mixed in. Writing should be an exercise, never forced labor if it doesn’t have to be.
As much as people like to organize life in a clear-cut fashion, for me, trying to do that becomes frustrating and fruitless. These days when I get up, I find I just get an idea in my head to run with. Then I try to set two or three goals a day.
That way, even if I don’t get done what I set out to do, at least I’ve gotten some progress done towards meeting those goals. That’s really the best I can do. I think that’s true for most of us, too.
Things rarely go to plan for me, especially with my writing. But, I just have to accept this. C’est la vie. Such is life.
~ Amelia <3